You Make Me Weak (The Blackwells of Crystal Lake Book 1) Read online

  She looked up at Hudson. At his dark, dangerous eyes. The sensual curve of his mouth. The fast-beating pulse at his neck. His hands slid down her body until they came to rest at her hips. He lifted her, and she automatically encircled his hips with her legs and sank her hands into his hair. He hesitated, just for a second, as if considering his actions, but then, with a groan, his mouth claimed hers. It was a kiss to end all kisses. It was hungry and tender. Demanding and coy. His mouth ravaged hers as if he were starving, and when he finally broke contact, they both had to take some time.

  She was trembling in his arms, her body on fire, and the throb between her legs was hard to ignore. She began to gyrate her hips, her head thrown back as his mouth slowly made its way down her throat.

  Hudson gently lowered her and took a step back. His erection strained beneath his jeans, and she licked her lips, eyes on the prize, as her heart rate skyrocketed.

  “Don’t,” he said hoarsely.

  When she met his gaze, the look in his eyes made her mouth go dry.

  “I mean it. Don’t make that sound again unless you want this over before it starts.”

  A slow smile curved her lips. “What sound is that?” she asked breathlessly, reaching for the top of her deep-blue sweater.

  “You know the one.” His voice was rough, eyes dark as onyx, and his hands hung loosely at his sides.

  “I don’t.” She pulled her sweater over her head and let it drop to the floor. “You’ll have to be more…specific.” Her tongue touched the top of her lip, and she loved how his eyes followed the movement. She felt powerful. Sexual. In total control.

  Rebecca slowly tugged on her zipper and then bent over provocatively as she stepped out of her boots and then tossed the jeans beside her top. When she straightened, his hands were no longer loose but fisted, and she knew he was close to the edge.

  Hudson moved toward her. “It’s like a half sigh but with a hint of whiskey.”

  “Whiskey?” she asked, tilting her head so she could see him better.

  “Yeah,” he murmured as he reached for her bra strap. She inhaled sharply as his knuckles grazed her bare skin. “This is a good look on you.”

  “Demi bra?”

  “That what this is?” His mouth drifted over where his knuckles had just been, and she stifled a groan.

  “Yes,” she managed to say as he nipped her collarbone. “There was a sale and…”

  “Thank God for commerce.” His hands were at the back clasp.

  “I remembered you liked blue.”

  “Best damn color in the world.” Her bra joined the clothes on the floor, and then his hands moved down her hips, his touch urgent as he ripped at her panties. There was a fever between them. A need to connect that fed a deep-rooted urgency.

  Rebecca’s fingers worked to get him as naked as she was, and when he tossed aside his jeans, she kissed him again. A long, soul-searching kiss that made her head spin and her body shake with need. She was wet and swollen and so damn worked up, she felt like crying.

  “I need you inside me,” she gasped when his mouth closed over one of her nipples. Each time he pulled and suckled, desire and need converged, shooting through her body and settling between her legs.

  “Hold on,” he said, voice gruff. With one last nip at her breast and then a kiss that made her knees shake, Hudson moved toward the fireplace and rifled through a bag. He unfurled a large blanket onto the floor in front of the fireplace, but she was there pushing him back onto it before he could do or say a thing.

  She grabbed the condom wrapper from his hands and smiled. “You really did think of everything.”

  “I tried.”

  She tore it open with her teeth. “I like that you’re so organized.” She stood over him, eyes smoldering at the look in his as he gazed at the junction between her legs.

  “It’s one of my strong suits.”

  She straddled him, smiled when he groaned and then swore, and she unrolled the condom over his cock. The muscles in his shoulders strained, and the look on his face was fierce. She leaned forward, her sensitive nipples grazing his chest as she kissed him again. God, he was like a fever she couldn’t shake. She needed to taste and touch, and she didn’t break contact as she slowly slid down on him.

  He groaned against her mouth, and she nearly wept at how good he felt inside her. He’d been her first. Their connection was both organic and chemical. No one would ever satisfy her the way this man did.

  They made love with a passion so raw and full of need, it left Rebecca speechless. Their bodies strained. Their hands clutched at each other. And when she came, it was his name on her lips. His body and mind that held hers. His soul that touched the very core of her being.

  And yet as the aftershocks of their lovemaking rolled over her, Rebecca should have felt content. And wanted. And satisfied. But she didn’t. She slammed her eyes shut and held him, hating that fear was blossoming inside her.

  Chapter 29

  Hudson woke up with an uneasy feeling in his gut, and that was worrisome, because he’d learned a long time ago to listen to his intuition. He didn’t know when or what, but something was headed his way, and he was pretty damn sure, whatever that something was, it spelled trouble.

  He rolled over but made no effort to get to his feet, because no way in hell was he giving up the warmth of the woman beside him. Instead, he watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she slept. She looked so damn relaxed and—a ghost of a smile touched his face as he reached for a long strand of hair that fell across her nose—so thoroughly loved. Her lips were swollen from his kisses, her skin flushed from the touch of his hand. He wouldn’t be surprised if she ached in new places, because he’d been tenacious in his quest to love every single inch of her. And then some.

  The fire had long since burned out, and while it was cool in the lodge, he wasn’t worried. Rebecca would be plenty warm beneath the pile of blankets they’d hauled out of the cupboard from one of the upstairs bedrooms. Restless, he slid from beneath the comforter, careful not to wake her and pulled on his jeans. He didn’t bother with a shirt and, barefoot, trudged over to the window. Dawn was breaking, and the horizon was lit up with streaks of gold that illuminated the frost-covered tips of the trees in a shimmery haze. Fog slithered across the still-unfrozen lake, long plumes of white shadow that moved in the breeze.

  It was going to be a gorgeous day up here, and Hudson had Rebecca all to himself until Sunday night. He was going to make the most of it. With one more look at the still-slumbering form, he headed to the kitchen and got busy preparing a feast of eggs, bacon, hash browns, and cornbread. In no time, he whipped together something to be proud of, and he’d just poured himself a coffee when Rebecca slipped into the kitchen, wearing nothing but his plaid shirt and a smile. It hung to mid-thigh, and even though the sleeves fell past her hands and covered more than it showed, she looked sexy as hell. With her tumbled hair and sleep-heavy eyes, she was something to behold.

  He took a mental picture, because it was one he’d be pulling out in the future.

  “What’s all this?” she asked, voice sleep heavy and sexy as hell.

  “I brought it up yesterday.”

  “You were sure of yourself.” There was a teasing lilt to her words, and he smiled.

  “Of what?”

  “Sure that I’d still be here.”

  “Can’t help it. I’ve always been an optimist. And besides…” He shot her a wicked grin. “I’m pretty good in the sack, so I assumed you’d be up for more.”

  She picked up a tea towel and threw it at him. He loved this. This ease they’d managed to find.

  They ate a hearty breakfast and talked about anything that struck their fancy, but nothing that really mattered. It was as if they were both ignoring the elephant in the room—which he supposed they were—but Hudson was content to just be with Rebecca and ignore anything that might spoil the moment.

  He’d told her to bring boots and warm clothing, and after a quick showe
r, they both got dressed. Rebecca was just pulling on her boots when she stopped and looked at him quizzically.

  “You don’t find it funny that this place has been renovated and updated? The bathroom we used is nicer than the one I just installed in my house.”

  Hudson buttoned his shirt and dropped a kiss on her nose. “Maybe Jake’s thinking of reopening.”

  “He never said anything?”

  He shook his head. “Nope.”

  “Weird.”

  Hudson grabbed their backpack and slipped it over his shoulders and pointed to the door.

  “Where are we going?” Rebecca gave him a quizzical look.

  “Follow me, and you’ll find out.”

  The two of them headed into the early morning sunshine. The snow clouds had given way to a clear blue sky, and the wind from the north was minimal. It was crisp and cold, but altogether a perfect November day. Hudson pointed to the path that led to the cabins, and the two of them moved in that direction.

  Here, the trees were mostly evergreen, pine, spruce, and fir. The smell of pine needles was heavy in the air and brought to mind hot chocolate, snow, and Christmas. They trudged along the path and stopped near the first cabin. Made of logs, like the rest of them, it boasted new windows, a new roof, and the bronze nameplate above the front door had been freshened up. Dry Run.

  Hudson stared at the name for a long time, unaware his easy manner had changed until Rebecca moved to his side.

  “Everything okay?” Rebecca asked, her voice light.

  “This was ours.”

  “What do you mean?” She followed his gaze.

  “This cabin. We’d have family reunions up here, and this cabin, Dry Run, was always ours. I liked it because it was the closest to the main lodge, and I’d beat all the other kids over there for breakfast. It was the highlight of my day.”

  She chuckled. “You weren’t hard to please.”

  “None of us were. We had it easy. So damn easy, and we didn’t know it. As long as Mrs. Thompson had her homemade strawberry freezer jam and biscuits, I was good to go. We spent our days on the water.” He pointed to a clearing just to the left of Dry Run. “And our nights around the fire. Wyatt was the singer. Jesus, nothing could get that kid to shut up. Dad would bring out his guitar, and the two of them would sing Hank Williams songs all night. They’d always end with a sing-along. ‘American Pie’ or something.” He stopped. “Huh. I forgot my dad played. How crazy is that?”

  Rebecca grabbed his hand and squeezed it.

  “It’s not crazy. It just is.”

  He shook off the memories and cleared his throat. “We should get going.”

  They hiked for nearly two hours, following a well-worn path that told Hudson the area was still used even though the resort hadn’t been in use in years. It wasn’t overgrown, and easy to follow. The higher they climbed, the less dense the trees were and the rockier the landscape became. When they finally reached the clearing, the sun was high in the sky, and Hudson doffed his jacket and slid off his backpack.

  “Oh my God.” Rebecca walked to the edge of the stone clearing. They were at the top of the hill they’d just hiked, one with deep ravines that led straight down into a neighboring body of water, Silver Lake. And in the distance, several smaller lakes stretched out, liquid blue among patches of evergreen and the many bare trees that had lost their leaves to the oncoming winter.

  “I forgot how beautiful this place was.”

  She turned in a full circle, and though her eyes were on the scenery below, Rebecca had his undivided attention.

  “Yes,” he murmured, walking toward her. He followed her gaze. “It’s incredible.” He wasn’t talking about the view, and when she glanced up at him, a gentle smile lit her face.

  “Do you remember the last time we came here?” she asked.

  Hudson nodded. “Best prom party ever.”

  She giggled. “I can’t believe us girls hiked up here in running shoes and gowns in the dark.”

  “Hell, Nash carried the whole damn sound system on his back.”

  “That’s right.”

  “And a small generator to run the thing.”

  She giggled. “And his date quit halfway up.”

  “Thank God. She whined the entire way.” Hudson opened up the knapsack and retrieved a blanket, two hot thermoses of soup, and biscuits.

  “You really thought of everything.”

  “You seem surprised.” He handed Rebecca one of the thermoses.

  “No. I just…” She shrugged. “I wasn’t expecting all this.”

  “You like?” he asked lightly.

  “I do.”

  They settled down on the blanket and ate their lunch, both enjoying the fresh air and amazing view.

  “So, FBI.” Rebecca looked at him quizzically.

  “Yeah.”

  “How’d that happen?”

  He shrugged and swiped at a bunch of crumbs on his lap. “I ended up at college on the West Coast and was recruited.”

  “Do you like it?”

  He was quiet as he considered his answer. “I do.” It seemed like the right answer, so why didn’t it feel right? He did like his job. It was rewarding, and he made a difference.

  “How’d you end up in Ohio?” Hudson changed the subject, leaning back onto his elbows as he gazed up at the sky.

  Rebecca chewed off the edge of her biscuit. “David had a job waiting for him. His uncle owned a car dealership, and he was a mechanic so…”

  “You don’t talk about him.” Hudson glanced up at her. He was curious as hell about her husband. Hell, he’d even gone after Nash for information, but that hadn’t gotten him anywhere. The guy was loyal to a fault and had no problem telling Hudson to back off. If Hudson wanted to know about Rebecca’s marriage, then he’d have to find out on his own.

  “No. He was…” She seemed to struggle for words.

  “Hey, we don’t have to talk about this.”

  “No. It’s fine.” Rebecca picked at the edge of her cuff. “David was…well, he was the answer to my prayers. At least, at first. I mean, I needed a distraction. A way to forget.”

  You.

  Rebecca didn’t have to say the word, but he heard it ring out inside his head. And he felt like an absolute shit.

  “He was a way out of this town, and I wanted to leave.” She turned her head slightly, but he saw the tremble in her lips and heard the quiver in her voice when she continued. “I’d known him all of two months when he asked me to move to Ohio with him. I figured you weren’t coming back, and by that time, I was so angry and hurt that even if you did, I’m not sure what I would have done. Ben was home again, and I just needed to get away.”

  Hudson sat up. “What about college? I know you’d taken off a few years, but you were all set to go.”

  She didn’t say anything for the longest time, and when she turned to him, her eyes were heavy, shadowed with a pain he was just starting to understand.

  “You left, Hudson, and I was broken. I can’t explain it any other way. I was empty, and I didn’t work anymore. I didn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t want to see anyone. I stopped eating.” Her voice broke, and he reached for her, but she moved quickly and got to her feet.

  “Violet tried to help. She knew how screwed up I was, but I wouldn’t let anyone inside. I locked myself in my room and kept the phone in there because I was sure you were coming back for me. I stared at that stupid thing for hours at a time, but it never rang, and you never came.”

  She shivered violently and wrapped her arms around her body. “One night, I found some pills, and I swallowed every single one.”

  “Jesus, Becs.” Pain lashed at him. Pain and self-loathing and anger at his weakness.

  “My mom found me, and Ben actually got me to the hospital.” She laughed bitterly. “He had a sober night. I guess it was a sign. The doctor said they saved my life, because I would have died within the hour. I spent a few weeks in the psychiatric ward, saw a counselor, and then they s
aid I was good to go home. By then, I’d missed the first week of college, not that it mattered. I didn’t have it in me to go.” She turned back to him, not bothering to hide the tears that shimmered in her eyes. “Then I met David.”

  “I came back.”

  He saw the shock on her face, and it only made him feel worse. “You came… When?”

  “About a month after you’d left for Ohio.”

  “No one told me. No one… I…”

  “I was back in Crystal Lake for all of five minutes before I ran into Nash and he filled me in. I came back for you, but you were gone. I didn’t bother with my father and didn’t make an effort to see my brothers. I left and didn’t come back for years.”

  Rebecca exhaled a long, shaky breath. “Look at us,” she said, attempting a smile through her tears. “We sound like a goddamn Nicholas Sparks movie.”

  “They usually have happy endings, don’t they?” He was going for something light, but it didn’t have the desired effect.

  “Sometimes,” Rebecca said softly.

  A big gust of wind tumbled across the clearing, and Hudson reached for his jacket. “We should head back,” he said quietly. They gathered up their things and began the trek through the bush to the lodge. By the time they reached the first of the small cabins, clouds were moving in, and Hudson could smell snow on the air.

  They were discussing dinner, which wine to open for dinner, the pinot noir or the merlot, when they spied a dark gray sedan parked beside Hudson’s truck. It was nondescript. Four door. Domestic. It screamed government.

  “Are you expecting anyone?” Rebecca asked, tugging on his arm because he’d come to a complete stop.

  That feeling was back, another punch to the gut, and this time it packed some power. He frowned darkly as he approached the front steps to the main lodge. Woodard leaned against the railing, a cigar hanging from the corner of his mouth, a bright red knit hat covering most of his balding head. He wore a gray suit, white shirt, navy tie, and light brown leather shoes. Totally inappropriate for the area, but so Woodard.

  Even out here, he was on the job.

  “How the hell did you find me?” Hudson stopped at the bottom of the stairs and glared up at the man who was about to ruin his day. Or week. Hell, maybe even his month.